Reflections: The Challenge Is To Love...

"A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge." Thomas Carlyle

Reflections: The Challenge Is To Love...Where is the love?

Love Defined: strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties; attraction based on sexual desire; affection and tenderness felt by lovers; affection based on admiration, benevolence or common interests Merriam Webster
Aside from the dictionary definition, When you think of Love, what is the first thought that crosses your mind? Pause and reflect on why that particular thought jumped before you. Is it affectionate, benevolent or obsessive love? Most of us spend our lives searching for romantic love and ignore other important elements that contribute to experiencing a healthy and robust love. We spend our time pursuing a lover, loving and hating each other, ignoring those who care about us without ulterior motives and, at the end of the day, we fall over exhausted from the emotional strain we've placed on ourselves.

Some people confuse pretending to be sweet as love. We act lovingly for fear of rocking the proverbial boat. But, pretending to be loving and not speaking the truth about wrong doing is not love; it's hypocrisy. The best teachers are forthright about what their students do because they see the potential for greatness in them. That is an act of love. If we sit back, pretend all is fab fab, and then participate in acts of meanness, we have failed ourselves and our opportunity to grow. That is not love. The challenge is to love ourselves and others unconditionally without expectation. When there is expectation, there is bound to be pain. How have you shown love to others today?


"Where there is love there is life." Mahatma Gandhi

Love is a universal language felt by all. Above is the Hebrew symbol of Love.  Sculptor: Robert Indiana

When I researched the word Love for this post, I found well over 450 million articles on the subject; clearly love matters to many of us, but we don't spend enough time cultivating a spirit of love. One article I read pointed out 15 types of love from: infatuation, romantic, passionate, companionate, unconditional, conditional, puppy, maternal, paternal, soulmate, spiritual/divine, patriotic, self, brotherly to tough love. However, when you look closely at the list, some are actually a subset of others within the grouping. The underlying message is that while love is filtered through many lenses, the essence of love is simply LoVE.

In Ancient Greece, people believed in four kinds of love: Agape; a pure spiritual love, Eros; a passionate/sexual or romantic love, Philia; an affectionate friendship love, and Storge; a parental/familial love. They added a very important fifth type of love: Xenia which is hospitality or charity to others. This act of generosity to strangers remains important today. When we look at the list, the first four are probably the easiest to implement because they generally, not always, come with conditions attached. We feel invested in those relationships, so we act accordingly - in a loving manner. The fifth which is a call to perform frequent random acts of kindness and to treat others by the Golden Rule is harder to do. Why do we find it hard to love unconditionally?
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"There is no remedy for love but to love more." David Henry Thoreau

Whether in symbols or words Love is every person's wish. Above  is a Chinese symbol of Love - Ai

A couple of weeks ago, we celebrated Valentine's Day in countries around the world. Some friends complained it had nothing to do with love and more to do with commercial interests and the need for some to assuage feelings of guilt. Whether you participated or not, what remains ironic is that right after the 14th, people reverted to their mean and petty ways; so the true meaning or lesson of that special day was wasted. If we spent our time asking ourselves a few questions, on a regular basis, we might be more inclined to give love more liberally and withhold our tendencies for pettiness.

Let's think about the following questions. How can I help my fellow man/woman today? What can I do to encourage another blogger/person/stranger today? What gives me the most joy? If I am angry with another, how can I tell the other person without becoming abusive? If I were to drop dead in the next hour, what would I have gained from petty hatreds? If I were to pass away today, what would people outside of my friends and family say about me? The challenge is to love yourself and, from that vantage point, treat others with equanimity = love. Are you willing to challenge yourself to love even your so called enemy today?

Some Food for Thought: What does love mean to you? Where is your love channeled right now? If you could shift your focus to be more loving, what would you do differently? Love and Peace!

I would love to hear from you: Please leave me a comment. Thank You!
PHOTO CREDITS/ATTRIBUTIONS: All Photographs:Where is the love, Ahava Sculpture by Robert Indiana, Chinese character for love,via Wikipedia, or my personal collection.

Until Next Time…
Ask. Believe. Receive. ©
Elizabeth Obih-Frank
Mirth and Motivation
Positive Kismet